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"*rolls* I don’t believe it. You make a perfect cheese and ham sandwich. The Mona Lisa of sandwiches. Your sandwich strikes awe in to everyone and ends the fight."

- gm at 4 am during a session of WoD (via outofcontextdnd)
Source: outofcontextdnd
Quote

"This charm is supposed to make people skeptical, but I don’t think it works."

- Our favorite shopkeeper NPC. (via outofcontextdnd)
Source: outofcontextdnd
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outofcontextdnd:

GM: You recognize the riders from legend; they seem to be The Four Horsemen.

Bard-barian, in character: Everywhere we go, there’s demons, angels, demigods bossing us around, wanting favors, getting us into trouble, sending us out for groceries. No more. *shouts to the horsemen* NO. GO THE FUCK HOME.

Source: outofcontextdnd
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"I’ve got a dead mage strapped to my back, a beastman strapped to my chest, a ratman on my shoulders providing cover fire, and two rages left for today… I don’t care what you say, I’m gonna eat that demon."

- Our Barbarian. (via outofcontextdnd)
Source: outofcontextdnd
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outofcontextdnd:

Rogue - “ONLY 1500 gold pieces!? These swords were used to slay Golgamosh the Ogre!”

Merchant - “I’ve never heard of Golgamosh.”

Rogue - “That just goes to show that they work.”

Merchant -“They have the initials (SG) of the guard captain on them.”

Bard - “No! That stands for Slain Golgamosh!” 

Source: outofcontextdnd
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outofcontextdnd:

DM: “You see a large pool of water, but its murkiness and the darkness of the cavern makes it impossible to tell the depth.”

Cleric: “I know! I throw my torch into the water.”

DM: “… The cleric with 7 Int throws your only light source into the water, where it immediately extinguishes and the wooden torch floats on the surface.”

Cleric: “It’s okay guys! See? It’s only a few inches deep!”

Source: outofcontextdnd
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outofcontextdnd:

DM: The Dragon awakens.

Rogue: Yes, hello! This crafty mage here was trying to abscond with all your gold and I am trying to bring it back to you, which is why I’m the one holding it.

Source: outofcontextdnd
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outofcontextdnd:

Jal: “Wow, this sword is kinda cool…you say you want something and somebody gets it for you. Who wants to get me a coke?”
*silence, until someone gets up and goes back to get a coke*
Jal: “It works!”
Other: “There’s only diet.”
Jal: *to sword* “DAMN YOU!!! DAMN YOU AND YOUR FALSE HOPES!!!”

Source: outofcontextdnd
Photo
Photo Set

undead-wanderer:

kattybats:

pumpkinappearifier:

DnD is a serious game.

will anyone please teach me to play this

(And this, ladies and gentlemen, is one of the many reasons I love DnD)

I love all of these

Source: biancohills